Prestige Edition comes with what!?

Yes, that's correct, I actually don't have any plans to get Modern Warfare 2. Don't get me wrong, I liked the first one, it was a fantastic game. However I got it a long time after it came out, I mean a long time and I stopped playing it before the people who got it on release day.
Since I blew through the single player and I hear the sequel's offering isn't any longer I just... meh. Multiplayer is definitely cool, deserves the praise it earned and kept me interested long enough to get through prestige mode 1 and a half times so far but that was it so I'm not foaming at the mouth to drop $60 on an improved (balance-wise, graphics-wise or otherwise) version of the same.
Of course there is a good chance I'll end up grabbing MW2 anyway, I didn't plan on buying the first one either...

Brutal Legend tells of a legendary warrior whose skills were the stuff of legend.

And that warrior...is Tim Schafer. Thought I was gonna say Jack Black or Eddie Riggs huh? Yup, it's ok, it happens.
So yes, the Brutal Legend demo did come out this week. And yes, it is awesome. How awesome you ask? Well, you've come to the right place to quantify abstract concepts: it's super freakin' awesome...but I guess you need more information than that. The best thing you could do would be download the demo and play for yourself. Actually the best thing you could do is go pre-order Brutal Legend to make sure another Tim Schafer concentrated disc of awesomeness doesn't get ignored completely *cough Psychonauts /cough* so we can get another one at some point in the future. For now though, we'll go with the second...third...a good thing you can do and read about Brutal Legend here on High Technology.
I'll dole out some quick background info on Brutal Legend for those of you that are really intent on ignoring all of Tim Schafer's work.

Brutal Legend is about metal. No, not shiny metal, but dark metal, heavy metal. I'm talking music here. And, as the opening cinema (of both the demo and the game) point out: real, skulls and demons and medieval (not MediEvil) weapons metal. No emo-y nu-metal or anything of that nature. Real M - E - T - A - L. Music that would make Dethklock proud. Don't worry though, even if you've never gotten/given a battle scar in a mosh pit and have no idea how to "throw up the devil horns" you will still enjoy this game. You will get more of the jokes though. Eddie Riggs is one of these lovers of metal, he's also the world's best roadie AND the game's main character, he's just a multi-talented guy. So talented, in fact, that he gets sucked into the Age of Metal by his magical, metal belt buckle after an unfortunate stage accident. Like I said, super freakin' awesome. Like I also said, it's best to see it for yourself. And the Age of Metal is in turmoil, lorded over by a terrible, metal-defiling demon whom only Eddie, it seems, can defeat. Along the way Eddie will pick up new gear (spellcasting guitar, hotrod called The Deuce) and allies (headbangers, Ozzy) to aid in his quest.
The demo actually covers a good portion of the game's opening. You'll see the opening cinema, get Eddies main weapon (a battle-axe called The Separator) his previously mentioned spellcasting guitar, and The Deuce. You'll even get your first ally/love interest, although you don't get the chance to teach her about french-kissing, in the demo anyway AND fight the first boss. Yet it's not a particularly long demo, hmmm...
The presentation you'll see in the retail release is in full effect in the demo as well. The menu consists of an elaborately packaged vinyl record being manipulated by a pair of hands. New game? flip open the cover. Multiplayer? Slide the paper sleeve out. Options? Slide the record out of the sleeve. You get the idea. All menu manipulation is done with the standard left, right method as well, they didn't make a minigame out of it. In fact, all the menus are littered with that special Schafer aroma. Pop-up menus asking if you want swearing and gore enabled or just explaining what buttons do have that little spice of Schafer-esque humor. The specifics of those I'm going to let you see for yourself, however.
Speaking of the buttons, once you get through the opening movie it'll be time to do some playing. Brutal Legend's controls are straightforward and the game trickles out it's tutorial information at appropriate and helpful times. Basically X is standard attack using the Separator with O acting as block and Square utilizing the guitar and it's magical spells. Triangle is a context-sensitive action button that can do everything from jump into the Deuce to grabbing your ally for a double-team move. The basic attacks have variations for holding the appropriate button down as well, and there's a combo that combines X and Square for a super usefull spell that involves some physical movement on Eddie's part as well. And there's no jump. I know, I know, "how can there be no jump?" There just isn't, and it works just fine.
Graphically, Brutal Legend isn't quite going to threaten teh crown currently held by Uncharted 2, but it certainy suffices. For the most part, textures are sharp and models are smooth and the animations is top-notch. Although you'll hear Jack Black's voice and realize it doesn't quite fit with the exceptionally muscular Eddie Riggs, the quality of the character's animation can regularly fog out that reality. For those that don't know Jack Black A) WTF!! and B) it may very well look flawless. And the art direction...well this is Tim Schafer and Tim Schafer loves metal sooo...look, I can't do everything for you here, some stuff you have to fill in the blanks on.
Speaking of Jack Black, he is in perfect form here. The same way that School of Rock dropped Jack Black into a movie best suited to his humor, so Brutal Legend does for video games. We could call it the Brutal School of Rock Legend...but we won't. How no one ever thought to put Schafer and Black together before I do not know, but i'm gladd I was alive when it happened. The collaboration really shines in things like the descent down the mountain of your arrival. While Eddie prays to the gods (player?) to move his conspicuously-absent-of-controls vehicle down the mountain you can cause him to stop and stumble verbally while trying to find appropriate adjectives by simply stopping the vehicle. Once you continue walking he picks up his prayer right where he left off. If you walk down the mountain nonstop the whole way, you'd never know the game even did that. Cool idea on Tim's part, funny dialogue on Jack's.
The music...I mean really, do I need to go into this? The game is about heavy metal so the soundtrack is entirely...heavy metal, yes, thank you. Moving on.
Considering how much fun I had with this excruciatingly small taste of Brutal Legend, I can't imagine how I'm going to wait the whole two weeks it will be before I can experience all of the different gameplay types, allies, metal legend cameos (Ozzy, Lemmy, etc.) and one-liners the full game will offer. I've considered cryogenically freezing myself, but that didn't work out so well for Cartman.

Section 8: Early Beta Impressions (oops)

So I got some new betas to test out on my PC (I call him Spike, by the way) and one of those betas happened to be Section 8. Now, I haven't gotten as much time to test this game out as I had hoped, but Spike's been kind of finnicky since I gave him a TV Tuner card. Hey, sometimes when you move across the country in pursuit of a career in the video game industry, you have to make your PC double as your TV/DVR because you can't fit everything in the Uhaul...but I digress.
Anyways, what I had originally thought to be a first-person take on Warhawk's "zone" capture points (capturing an area grants you equipment and defenses such as turrets) is actually quite the intriguing and surprisingly tactical effort. So far.
Like I said, it's still early. Section 8 is certainly no graphical beast, Crysis still sits firmly atop its throne, but it's no slouch either. My PC isn't exactly top of the line, but I do like to tinker and I can get S8 to run at maximum settings, so I've seen the full polish. This is actually a good thing however, as system requirements can be a barrier for the casual/not-absurdly-rich PC gamer
Unfortunately, everything written up until this point was done while the beta was still running...and it ended before I got any more play time in. In fact, the game is on store shelves right now.
But I will tell of what I saw while it lasted.
As i mentioned already, there is a lot more tactical thinking involved in Section 8 than I would have originally thought. That doesn't mean you have to be an RTS or Tactical RPG veteran to do well in S8, your average FPS junkie will do just fine as well. The options that exist seem to be there just for the people interested in that kind of thing, the same kind of people that require stat tracking for their multiplayer modes, the kind of people that actually care about the content written here.
One of these facets that offered more tactical choice than originally thought was the game's big bullet point: "burn in." For those that haven't followed Section 8, "burn in" is the game's version of spawning. When you die in Section 8 you don't just magically reappear on the battlefield, you drop thousands of feet from a drop ship to land on the battlefield, in player-controlled real time. When the match begins (or after you've died) you are presented with a complete map of the current level and are able to pick any area as your drop point. You are then jettisoned from the ship and sent screaming to the ground below, with a HUD and audio warning tell you when to hit the brakes adn avoid going splat.
The average player will probably just look for a good spot with teammates around (all your live teammates positions are shown on the map) or an open space and drop right there. Players takign a more in-depth aproach haev other choices, however, and a lot of that plays into the attributes you give your character. Each player can equip two main weapons and a secondary one (grenades, knife, etc.) with no limitations related to the "class" you choose. There's a reason "class" is in quotes. This game makes classes less of a Team Fortress 2 affair and more of a "Custom Slot #" Modern Warfare setup. Several predefined/named classes are available, but they can all be changed in any way the player sees fit, a decent option when one considers the weapons, and openind to countless options when one brings Section 8's "perks" into play.
Aside from weapon choices, there are several slots for the attribute's of a players armor. These involve things like stealth that hides you from radar and turrets, armor plating that gives you stronger shileds, even boosters that allow you to run faster and longer. With the number of options available, the play can truly create a character to suit their play style, and accomodate several styles depending on what role or goal they are trying to accomplish.
These attributes also affects the burn-ins and is where a large part of the tactical aspect sneaks into the game. All occupied bases are armed with Anti-Air turrets to prevent enemy players from dropping right into the center of said base. So depending on what you're trying to achieve at that particular point in the match you can use a character with high levels of the ANTI-Anti-Air attribute which gives you more time before the turrets stat firing at you and even protection from their rounds. One the map, prior to burn-in, the area in rang of these guns is highlighted in red. You can still drop into these areas but chances are good you'll be destroyed before you land if you're not properly equipped. This can also affect when you decide to hit the brakes during your drop. Once you hit the brakes, you your fall begins to slow and you're given free movement in order to fine tune your landing. If you're in range of AA guns, however, moving slower means getting shot at longer. Throw in the decision of "do i drop in with my teammates engaged in a fight with the other team or do i drop back in enemy territory to distract them and maybe capture a base for my team?" along with all the other things that need to be decided BEFORE YOU EVEN START PLAYING and you've got yourself an FPS with a lot more depth than it initially lets on.
As for how it actually plays when on the battlefield: it's decent. The weapons are all appropriately over-the-top futuristic with the only problem being how similar they all look; am I holding an assault rifle or a shotgun? There's zoom on appropriate weapons and a lock-on whose duration depends on your armor's attributes. If you need to get somewhere fast sprinting for a few seconds opens up some kind of afterburner on your armor and your character starts moving so fast the camera's pushed back to a 3rd person view...ok that was probably just a creative decision. Due to the small amount of time i got with the game, i'm going to keep from presentign too much opinion on the gameplay itself, but there are a few things I will mention:
What's going on? there never seems to be a very clear description of the current objective during a match. Things will pop up occasionally like "The enemy has initiated ____" mission" and you'll ned to kill an enemy general or convoy. How these missions get initiated I have no idea. I also have no idea how turrets are constructed or what capturing an area does, but that's also due to my limited time with the game. Basically my issue is how little the game holds your hand but again I had very little time with the game and this was a beta. By the time the player finishes the single-player campaign they should have an answer to these questions. Except maybe: Why does the shotgun look just like the Assault rifle?

Sex and Playstation; Grow up.

So I'm still sifting through the mass of news that accompanies E3 and finding the stuff worth writing about as well as waiting for confirmation on some of the more shadowy details that came out of this year's expo (Metal Gear Solid: Rising, I'm looking at you.) before I start writing my coverage of the videogame circus that is E3. In the meantime, however, I came across some of the details of BioWare's new IP: Dragon Age: Origins and the mounting controversy that tickled my irritate bone just enough that I had to write something about it. BioWare's including sexual relationships in the game. Gasp!

This isn't a first for a BioWare game, and far from a first for the industry, yet people still can't seem to get past it. Look people, sex happens. It's a regular part of everyday life, it's not something that needs to be hidden behind closed doors and looked down upon as something dirty (despite what the Catholic church tells you) just as it's not something to be held up on a pedestal as the ultimate goal in life (despite what the porn industry tells you) and if you're telling the story of an adult's life, sex is most likely going to be part of it. Yet the general public can't seem to accept this and continue to think of sex in videogames the same way they think of sex in their parents lives: it doesn't happen.
But let's get more into BioWare's take specifically. The first time they got into hot water (or Hot Coffee maybe?) was with the game Mass Effect. At the game's outset you create your own character, male or female, and edit their appearance however you like. Whatever you decide, there are two potential romantic interests. There is a male or female human depending on which sex you chose to play as and there is also an alien that is technically neither male nor female, yet whose appearance suggests the latter. Beyond the finger wagging that including a sexual relationship in their game earned them, BioWare also found controversy for allowing players to engage in an apparent lesbian encounter with said alien. What!? Videogames promoting tolerance!? Blasphemy! Depravity! Pornography!
To some of you that may sound stupid, but I remind those of you that we, as a society, still can't seem to decide if we should let homosexuals marry despite the fact that no one has yet put forth a legitimate reason not to. Videogames already catch flak and endure absurd levels of controversy for depicting things commonplace in other mediums so this really shouldn't have been such a surprise. Yet I remain flabbergasted by this. Yes, my flabber has been thoroughly gasted. There are games that throw in sex gratuitously (see the menage a trois minigames in the God of War series, or any Leisure Suit Larry game in general) but those are done in a very tongue-in-cheek way and never made out to be anything more then they are: indulgent, adolescent fantasy intended purely for entertainment. Speaking of God of War, it amuses/irritates me to no end that a game where you can literally tear a guy's arm off and impale him with it faced the most opposition because of it's depiction of bare breasts (this is Greek mythology we're dealing with) and a threesome minigame, with the actual threesome taking place off-screen no less!
BioWare games take an appropriately mature approach to the subject and make it more about the relationship itself and the consequences of adding sex to it. Choose the alien to foster your adult relationship with and your fiery subordinate is going to get angry and pout. Choose said spitfire and the alien will be hurt but understanding. And since your characters and the choices you've made carry on to the game's sequels (isn't modern technology grand) those consequences are only the tip of the proverbial iceberg.
Dragon Age seems to be taking that idea of consequences even further (it didn't take place until almost the very end in Mass Effect...is that a spoiler? Whatever.) with your choices between romantic partners and how your relationship with one affects your relationship with the other, and possibly even more people than you would have thought. And as is the case with real life, even getting these relationships to the point where sex becomes a possibility takes some real effort. Shacking up with one woman makes the other jealous, and maybe even angry or hostile. If you've been flirting with both up to that point, the consequences are even more tangible than had you simply pursued one and left the other to her own devices.
Now both of these women appear to be more than just eye candy and a chance to get your groove on, they serve gameplay purposes. For example, Morrigan is a sorceress. If you break her heart she's not going to lend her magic to your side in battle...and there's always the chance she'll turn you into a toad. Alright, maybe not the toad part but you get my meaning.
The point is, people get to hung up on the sex. Sex is just sex people, it's an integral part of everyday life; without it we can't survive as a species. What seems to get lost amidst the idiocy, is what taking it to a sexual level means to your romantic relationship as well as how it affects, directly or indirectly, your relationship with others, it's part of the story. If you want to depict an adult that has a fully-realized romantic relationship, sex is going to be a part of that relationship. Pretending sex doesn't happen just because it makes you twitch is simply adding a level of pure fantasy to the story you're attempting to tell. The game isn't forcing you to have sex either, it's simply making the option available. This is a role-playing game, after all, a game in which you play a role, and putting as many options as possible at the player's disposal is what allows the player to play their role however they want. Want to go around banging any chick that bats her eyelashes at you? Go ahead, as long as you're ready to deal with the consequences of such promiscuity (digital STD's? hmmmm...). Want to be celibate and act like you're some kind of priest while simultaneously going around killing things? Hey, it is a fantasy game.
Forgetting the relationship and getting hung up on the sex part -- thinking it should be kept in the dark and out of sight -- is the reaction of a repressed individual and I pity you. Sex is sex, it's normal, it's fun, and most of all it's necessary. If you can't find a way to wrap your mind around that and move on with your life...well, you need to grow up.

Modern Warfare 2 Screenshots.

For those of you interested in seeing how Modern Warfare 2 is shaping up graphically, IGN has got some new screenshots.

Aliens Vs Predator: Like the Movies, Only Good.

For those of you that don't play videogames and have only experienced this wet dream of violence through the movies...sucks to be you. Hopefully there are gamers out there old enough to remember the original Aliens vs. Predator game from a decade ago and won't be turned off by the lame movies, because this one's looking preeetty suh-weet.

Rebellion is back on the job and hopefully the fact that they haven't really made a good game since the original AVP just is a sign that they are only meant to make games in that series, not that they've lost their touch. OK...Rogue Trooper was decent.

Back to the main topic, the new Aliens vs Predator appears to be something of a reboot (man those are popular these days) as it's not a direct sequel. The game will be coming to the PC, PS3 and Xbox360.

Unlike the original which let you choose whether you wanted to play as Human, Alien, or Predator, this one takes a Call of Duty 4 approach and switches you between the 3 for each level. Apparently all that's been shows so far is the Predator side, but according to IGN, it's damn fun. Despite what you may think of the Predator, he's not a tank-like killing machine, he is a very ninja-like hunter whose main objective is to separate individuals from the crowd and take them down one by one. The biggest aid in successfully playing this way is undoubtedly the Predator's signature cloaking device, i.e. you go all shimmery and invisible like in the movies. Honestly, if you just think back to the Predator movies you'll have a pretty good idea of what's at his disposal. The aforementioned cloak, infrared vision, wrist-mounted extendable blades, that triangle laser-sighted gun (plasma caster), there's rumored to be that bladed boomerang from Predator 2, and perhaps coolest of all is the Focus visual mode.

Focus mode displays all kinds of information about your surroundings and enemies. Need to find your objective? Focus mode. Want to know what weapons that marine is carrying? Focus mode. Want to know if jumping to that bit of ground from a tree is going to make enough noise to attract attention? Focus. Mode.

Speaking of attracting attention, you can mimic a human voice in order to lure marines away. Since you can set traps with mines, or just rip his skull and spine out (and keep it as a trophy, literally) with your blades, this can lead to all kinds of sadistic fun. The same goes for aliens (well not the voice part, obviously...they don't' really talk) but killing them is a bit more of a challenge.

Now, if you've got an Alien at a distance, there's not much issue. One shot from your plasma caster and that Alien is a pile of entrails. The problem is that they like to move in packs and are very good at sneaking up on you. Once an alien is in close, you're in trouble. If you remember the movies, Aliens have acid blood. This means that if you're up close when you kill one, especially with your blades, you're in for a world of pain. Getting a corpse-full of acid sprayed on your face hurts...a lot.

But these aren't the only enemies. There's the obligatory Alien queen to take care of and somewhere out there lurks a Predalien, a mix of both Predator and Alien seen in the movie Alien vs Predator: Requiem. So if this game sounds pretty sweet to you, check out some more in-depth coverage over at IGN.

E3: Like Hannukkah for Nerds!

Only shorter. Yes, it's E3 time again. And with the Electronic Entertainment Expo comes a LOT of videogaming news. Every day of the event there are new announcements from every company, whether it's one of the hardware companies (Microsoft, Nintendo, Sony) or software (EA, Activision, Ubisoft, Naughty Dog, etc.) there's plenty to keep a gaming fan busy, which means there's plenty to keep a gaming blogger busy as well.
I'm going to do my best to keep up with all the major announcements and post them along with commentary in keeping with my sense of humor. All in an effort keep my theoretical readers entertained and abreast of what's going on, don't you feel special? If I do miss something, however, well...I don't care. But feel free to wine about it so I have something to ignore.
Happy E3!

Downloadable "Braaaaaiiinnns." Zombie Apocalypse.

Zombie Apocalypse. Just sounds cool doesn't it? Well sometime next month we'll find out if it plays as cool as it sounds when Konami and Nihilistic's game hits the Playstation Store and Xbox Live Arcade.

As you've probably guessed from the title, this game involves killing zombies, lots of them. This is a four-person top-down shooter that probably has more in common with Zombies Ate My Neighbors than Left 4 Dead (with a control setup akin to Geometry Wars or Super Stardust), but should satisfy fans of both.

Basically, you pick one of four characters (very reminiscent of Left 4 Dead) and then use everything from machine guns, flamethrowers and chainsaws to make the undead...re-dead. There are several environmental hazards to use in disposing of the zombies as well. An airport level, for example, has a running jet engine that you can push the zombies into, resulting in a satisfying spray of blood and gore.

Each "day" of this particular apocalypse will act as a level within the game, 55 in total. In typical videogame fashion, each level will get progressively harder with denser waves of zombies and even a few special zombies that are more dangerous. So far the game definitely looks to be as fun as a barrel full of...zombies...that you get to shoot at.

Let's just hope all the zombies are white (Caucasian? do we worry about political correctness here?) so we don't end up with another Resident Evil 5 fiasco. (Really people? They're videogames...about ZOMBIES. Lighten up.)

If you want to check out some more in-depth coverage on the game, head on over to the Playstation Blog.

Team Ico Project #3

So it looks like Team Ico has finally released something more on it's third game than that damn cryptic teaser image.

Or at least that's the word so far. This new video footage is from PlaystationLifeStyle.net, which is a rumor site, and is getting here through a story on joystiq. Rumor, however, does not necessarily mean false, and though the footage hasn't been confirmed, the opening scene does have a shot identical to the official teaser image. This game will be a follow up to the highly respected Ico and Shadow of the Colossus.

Now for a REAL Test of Hand-Eye Coordination. Rock Band: Unplugged

For those of you that didn't think the regular version of Rock Band was enough of a challenge to your motor skills, now Rock Band: Unplugged asks you to play the game and walk at the same time. Yes, Rock Band is coming to the PSP, welcome to the party.


Those of you familiar with Harmonix's first two outings, FreQuency and Amplitude, will find the most comfort in the gameplay of RB:U, since lugging around a drum set, or even a guitar, hampers the whole "portable" thing. For those that didn't support Harmonix in their earlier days, (shame on you, first of all; that's why I didn't link those two titles, look them up yourself) what this means is that you play with just the face buttons of the PSP (well, two face buttons: Triangle and Circle, and two D-Pad directions: Left and Up) rather than plugging in a plastic instrument. While this will limit most people's ability to effectively "rock out" with such moves as air kicks and powerslides, you're better off not performing such moves while waiting on the subway platform anyway. Feaux rockstar stage antics aside, Harmonix has already released the complete track listings for the game which I will present to you...now:

AFI - "Miss Murder"
Lush - "De-Luxe"
Alice in Chains - "Would?"
Mighty Mighty Bosstones - "Where'd You Go?"
All-American Rejects - "Move Along"
Modest Mouse - "Float On"
Audioslave - "Gasoline"
Motorhead - "Ace of Spades"
Billy Idol - "White Wedding Part 1"
Nine Inch Nails - "The Perfect Drug"
Black Tide -"Show Me the Way"
Nirvana - "Drain You"
Blink 182 - "What's My Age Again"
The Offspring - "Come Out and Play (Keep 'em Separated)"
Bon Jovi - "Livin' on a Prayer"
Pearl Jam - "Alive"
Boston - "More Than a Feeling"
The Police - "Message in a Bottle"
Dead Kennedys - "Holiday in Cambodia"
Queens of the Stone Age - "3's and 7's"
Foo Fighters - "Everlong"
Rush - "The Trees"
Freezepop - "Less Talk More Rokk"
Siouxsie & the Banshees - "The Killing Jar"
Jackson 5 - "ABC"
Smashing Pumpkins - "Today"
Jethro Tull - "Aqualung"
Social Distortion - "I Was Wrong"
Jimmy Eat World - "The Middle"
Soundgarden - "Spoonman"
Judas Priest - "Painkiller"
System of a Down - "Chop Suey!"
Kansas - "Carry on Wayward Son"
Tenacious D - "Rock Your Socks"
The Killers - "Mr. Brightside"
3 Doors Down - "Kryptonite"
Lacuna Coil - "Our Truth"
Weezer - "Buddy Holly"
Lamb of God - "Laid to Rest"
The Who - "Pinball Wizard"
Lit - "My Own Worst Enemy"



And if this is the first you're hearing about this game you can check out a hands-on that ign did awhile ago here.

Soul Calibur: A Tale of Swords and Portability

First: Project Soul is working on yet another Soul Calibur game. Second: It's on PSP. Third: It's looking pretty damn good.

Yup, that's pretty much the gist of it. Another entry in the venerable Soul Calibur series, this time portable thanks to the PSP. So the next time you want to take a giant axe to the obnixous toolbox on the bus, you can! So long as he has a PSP...or you're ok with substantial prison time. If it's the latter please move away from your monitor and to the nearest psychiatric hospital.

Now, for all you non-sociopaths, this entry comes to us under the title of Soul Calibur: Broken Destiny. If you're looking for an entirely original entry into the series with all the requisite upgrades...well you're deluding yourself. This is more or less a portable version of SCIV sans Star Wars characters (Mitsurugi FTW!).

At least one thing you can be assured of already is that the title looks fantastic for a portable game. And yes, if anyone actually has to ask, Ivy still looks like a surgically enhanced, bondage-fetish slut. Thank God/How immature.

Free Fists of Plastic!

There's something of a deal going on at the Playstation Store right now, and that deal is Ragdoll Kung-Fu: Fists of Plastic.


I remember when this game was originally released for the PC via steam, but since then it has apparently made the move to consoles, remaining a downloadable title.
The game is free for one week on the Playstation Store, and since it is quite fun, I highly recommend adding it to your hard drive.
You get yourself a little plastic action figure/ragdoll, customize to personal preference, and then beat the crap out of similar characters. You aim your attacks with the left stick, punch with square, kick with triangle, jump with X, and block with circle. There are some SIXAXIS dependant special moves as well. At first these seem completely unnecessary (and probably are) but it's somehow fun to jerk your controller left and watch your character go flying left on the screen.
The single-player mode is really just a set of tutorials, and there's no online functionality, but if you have some live, tangible friends by your side, there is fun to be had. The lack of online play really hurts the game, but you CAN fill in slots with bots, and since the game is at it's best with all 4 player slots filled, you would be best served to make use of said bots. The multiplayer has standard modes like deathmatch, king of the hill, and capture the fish (flag) as well as the somewhat unique Dodgeball. Dodgeball still plays like a deathmatch but has a deathdealing dodgeball that will kill any player it hits in a single blow and is probably the most standout of multiplayer modes. There's a decidedly Super Smash Bros. feel to the game, with the fast-moving chaos of fighting and random weapons/powerups that fall from the sky, but Ragdoll Kung-Fu definitely does not live up to the same standard of quality as Smash Bros.
That said, the chaotic gameplay, jerky motion-sensitive special moves, and general sense of humor make this game a worthwhile download...while free. Once May 21st hits and the game goes back to its regular retail price of $10 however, you'd be better off spending your money elsewhere. And good luck getting the annoyingly catchy theme song that plays from the XMB out of your head. "Aaaaaahhhhh Ragdoll Kung-Fuuuuu..."

Apocalypse Later. Darksiders: Wrath of War

So ign has a pretty nice pre-E3 preview of THQ's Darksiders: Wrath of War up. The game seems to be shaping up pretty well, but I still find it annoying there has yet to be any mention of this game's original announcement back in 2003 as a PS2 game, but maybe that's because the only known details at the time were that you played as at least one of the Four Horesmen attempting to stop the coming apocalypse...I don't know.

The graphics, especially on some of the characters, still kind of bug me. In some shots they look just fine, yet in others look almost as if it's from the latest World of Warcraft expansion (easy WoW fanatics, the art direction is excellent, but technologically speaking it's definitely last-gen). Like I said, something's just...off. The game is still in development though, so I'll save final judgement until then.
Anyway, if you're interested in more detail on the game than my rambling will get you, I advise you to check out the preview.

Bionic Commando

Well, yet another game about saving a city after a cataclysmic explosion got reviewed this week, this time it's Grin-developed Bionic Commando. This follow-up to the classic NES game (which received a remake last August, also handled by Grin.) is available on the PC, PS3 and Xbox 360.
There are two reviews you can check out, courtesy of joystiq and ign, both of which paint the game in a pretty favorable light.
The general setup is as follows, series protagonist Nathan "Rad" Spencer (yes...I know, but ridiculous names are what you get when your game is based on a title from the '80s) has been imprisoned for the past 10 years after being framed for a crime. Said framing is also responsible for creating a negative attitude towards any bionically-enhanced persons. So Nathan sits in prison with only one arm (I get you don't like bionics, Ascension City, but not even a prosthetic?) until a terrorist group sets of a big explosion that levels Ascension City and commanding officer Super Joe (damn you '80s) sets him free to put a stop to the terrorists.
Commando Nathan is promptly reunited with his arm and regains the Bionic prefix before setting of for all kinds of swinging, gunplaying, car-throwing, dreadlock-having gameplay. From what I've read there are a few issues with the game (slow start, rigid linearity) that chip away at its overall quality but since I haven't played it you're probably better off reading through the reviews on either site (or both!).

Uncharted 2: Six Minutes of "Hells yeah!"

Although I doubt anyone out there is anticipating Uncharted's sequel quite as much as I am due to my rampant Naughty Dog fanboyism, (any job openings, guys?) you can probably still appreciate this nearly six minutes (5:40) of gameplay footage from Uncharted 2: Among Thieves, courtesy of ign.


First, put on some sort of protective headwear in case of an actual mind-blowing, then click here.

Sucker Punch delivers inFAMOUS or inFAMOUS delivers sucker punch?

So developer Sucker Punch's latest game inFAMOUS is about a week away from release now, close enough for it to be getting review scores from some of the bigger gaming publications (both print and digital) and if Metacritic is any indication, Sony has nabbed itself another slam-dunk exclusive for it's Playstation 3.
For those of you that haven't been following the game, inFAMOUS gives you an open-world city (Empire City) in the vein of Grand Theft Auto 4 while adding the "climb whatever you want" headline of Assassin's Creed and a dash of electricity based superpowers for protagonist Cole.
The story goes like this: Cole is a bike messenger, just a regular guy, until one of the packages he's delivering goes "BOOM!" As in a city-levelling "boom." So the city's left more or less destroyed, the government's quarantined it (I wonder if that took as long as it did to get water to the Superdome?) and Cole's left in a coma. That is, until he wakes up with more electricity at his fingertips than someone wearing wool feety pajamas in house made of shag carpet.
The game then sets off to let you fill your superhero/supervillain fantasies in pursuit of an answer to the question "Do you save it all, or destroy what's left?" that was asked in the inFAMOUS debut trailer. What this means is you'll spend the game facing morality choices determining if you're a good witch or a bad witch...I mean superhero. Some of these choices are obvious ones that the game points out to you by actually pausing things and asking if you want to be good or bad, others just depend on how you act throughout the game; do you drain passerby of their body's electrical energy to refill your own powers or maybe use your hands as defibrillator's on the heart failure victim laying on the sidewalk? The bigger morality choices that the game points out to you are in fact handled slightly better than the choices offered in other games where morality is a factor in gameplay; there's actually realistic justification for the "bad" decisions. In fact, "selfish" or "benevolent" are more accurate desciptors than "good" or "bad."
All in all inFAMOUS sounds like it fully delivered on its awesomeness quota. With the PS3's recent ability to pump out truly AAA exclusive titles one after another the only thing that really seems to be holding back the system's success is Sony's refusal to drop the price low enough to not require a payment plan. Oh well, there's always "surprise" E3 announcements. And here's to hoping God of War 3, Heavy Rain, and Fat Princess keep up the current trend.

Artistic Differences